Tragedy Strikes
Getting Through The Crisis
In the aftermath of the terrorist attacks, all Americans are experiencing varying amounts of disbelief,
grief, fear, and even anger. Some may have lost loved ones, friends or colleagues. Others have anxieties
about the future. Nobody is unaffected. Our world has drastically changed, and focusing on business-as-usual
is difficult now. But, returning to productive work is a necessary step in our healing, as individuals and
as a nation.
How do we cope with the reality of what has happened to our fellow countrymen and women? How can we get
back on track at work? ...at home? How can we tell if someone is having trouble coping with the tragedy?
What if you are that someone? We must remember that everyone will deal with the tragedy differently, and
for some people, the effects of the disaster may not be felt immediately, but instead may arise in months
and, in some cases, years to come.
Signs of emotional impact over the coming weeks and months differ with each individual. We may begin to
see the emotional impact of the terrorist attacks both at work and at home. Our lives may be affected in
the following ways:
At Work
- working slowly
- missing deadlines
- calling in sick frequently
- absenteeism
- widthdrawl from work activity
- overworking
- forgetting directives, procedures and requests
- difficulty with work transistions or changes in routine
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At Home
- irritability and anger
- difficulty concentrating and making decisions
- appearing numb or emontionless
- anxiety and fear
- withdrawl from activity
- sadness
- distrust
- feeling protective of loved ones; anger and/or desire for revenge
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Other life-changing events can have similar effects on our lives. Perhaps a parent enters a nursing home,
or a close family member is paralyzed in a car accident. Maybe a coworker unexpectedly dies in a work-related
accident, or a close friend loses their battle with cancer. Life-changing events like these affect everyone
differently. Knowing how to handle events like these is life is what helps us overcome it without getting
mired in the misery that can accompany adversity.
What Can You Do?
- Know what to expect of yourself. You may experience emotions of denial, disbelief, confusion,
shock, sadness, yearning, anger, humiliation, despair and guilt. In addition, you may not be
prepared of the intensity and duration of your emotions or how swiftly your moods may change.
However, these feelings are common, healthy and will help you come to terms with the tragedy.
Be aware that you may resolve your feelings and symptoms but then have a recurrence of traumatic
symptoms during stressful times, such as retirement, divorce, or loss of a loved one.
- Talk and listen patiently with your family members and co-workers. If you feel grief, anxiety
or anger, you are not alone. Talk to family, friends and colleagues who may be experiencing some
of the same feelings. Some may have gone through the aftermath of other disasters. When listening,
don't try to "fix it" or offer false comfort, especially is somebody has lost a loved one. Instead,
offer a simple expression of sorrow and take time to listen to them. Talking with people helps us
feel less isolated and anxious. This also helps us "reality check" our reactions, making us realize
our feelings are normal. It also helps to bring back to reasonable parameters, feelings of vengeance
or fear that we may be experiencing. Discourage damaging ways of coping, such as excessive drinking.
Don't hesitate to recommend professional help when you feel someone is experiencing too much pain to
cope alone.
- Give yourself permission to be distracted.
- Be kind toward others and tolerant of ways in which their coping needs may differ from yours.
People will respond differently and recover at different paces. Some will want to get back to work
to regain a sense of control, and others will have difficulty focusing for some time. This is a
normal response to a crisis. Many people survive disasters without developing significant psychological
problems, but many may need assistance.
- Avoid real and symbolic violence. If you are feeling overwhelmed by the television images of the
Trade Center collapsing, listen to the radio, or avoid news sources altogether for awhile. Periodically,
you can ask others if there is any significant new information you should know. Avoid entertainment
with violent themes or images.
- Structure your time. Keep your life as normal as possible. Don't make any major life changes.
- Help your children understand in ways that are not overwhelming. For example, young children might
need breaks from the television imagery. You might reassure children that it is okay for them to now
know what to do. Instead, there are responsible and competent adults who are handling this by each
doing their specialized jobs. Emergency crews are helping the victims and their families, investigators
are working to identify who is responsible, safety personnel are working to prevent other incidents.
Let them express their feelings and ask questions. Reassure them that they are safe, and try to get back
to your family routine as soon as possible.
- Business will go on. Acknowledge that work will be subdued and perhaps very different in some ways,
depending on your particular industry and how severely is was impacted, but there will be continuity.
Returning to productive work will help with healing as individuals and as a nation.
- Many people with family in the government, military or living overseas may be concerned for their
ongoing safety. Find out if friends or coworkers fall into this category, and encourage them to seek
support and care as needed.
- While anger is a natural reaction, prejudice and racism shouldn't be tolerated. It was hatred that
caused these senseless and despicable events, and we must not permit ourselves to sink to that level by
expressing hostility to members of specific ethnic and religious groups in the workplace, among customers,
or in our communities.
- Take care of yourself and your family. Eat well, get plenty of rest and exercise, spend time with
those closest to you doing things you enjoy. Postpone major life decision and other significant stressors
when you can.
- Seek help if you need to. If your feelings are too much to bear, seeking help is a sign of strength,
not weakness. Encourage family members, friends and coworkers to seek help if they are having trouble
coping.
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